Last Updated on July 19, 2024 by Paola Castillo

How to Improve Your Self-Confidence

Self-confidence sometimes feels like the result of a 90’s movie montage scene, but there’s so much more to self-confidence than having a fun-filled makeover scene. Self-confidence can feel a bit intimidating, especially because we see it everywhere! Do you ever just want someone to give you a guide to get started? Well, you’re in the right spot! Hopefully, with the help of this easy guide and these recommendations for self-love books, you’ll be able to start creating a strong sense of confidence.

Books on Self-Love

Let’s start with some self-love books that may resonate with you and get you feeling better than the lead in a romantic comedy.

The Gift of Self Love Workbook

First up, we have The Gift of Self Love Workbook, which gives you many ways to work on your sense of confidence. Some of these ways include a mix of the author’s personal stories, a self-esteem and self-confidence quiz to assess how you feel about yourself today by identifying areas to give yourself more love, writing exercises to help you rewrite limiting beliefs and stop pressuring yourself to meet other people’s expectations, a positive self-talk guide to help you reframe your thoughts and silence the negative voice in your head, and finally recommendations for loving your body. This is a book on self-love you have to get!

You Are a Badass!

Next up, we have this New York Times bestseller, You Are a Badass! This down-to-earth book relates to you in a funny and sassy way and includes ways to identify and change the self-sabotaging beliefs and behaviors that stop you from getting what you want. Create a life you totally love. And create it NOW, e.g. make some damn money already. This author has a series of books that tackles all sorts of things, including money. The key takeaways from this book: relatable and easily applied ways to boost your self-confidence!

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*CK

Now, if you want to be a more confident person AND you’re not afraid of some curse words, then try this well-known book, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*CK. The author Mark Manson makes the argument, backed both by academic research and well-timed poop jokes, that improving our lives hinges not on our ability to turn lemons into lemonade, but on learning to stomach lemons better. His no-holds-barred approach to telling you to save your f**ks about certain things is well worth your attention.

So far we’ve had some really popular self-love books that delve into the parts of self-confidence that culminate into a whole. Remember that self-confidence comes from your mental state, physical state, and spiritual state. The combo of these three things increases your quality of life. Let’s continue onto some books that focus a little more on an outside-the-box approach to improve self-confidence.

The Wild Unknown Journal

Let us introduce you to The Wild Unknown Journal. This journal by Kim Krans is an introspective journey to unpack some of the noise in your mind. Krans is the author of the popular Wild Unknown Tarot among others. This journal begins with a dynamic, interactive introduction that invites you into this contemplative space and explains how to use the journal and all the possibilities it offers. This stunningly 125-page journal offers liberating and meditative direction, opening the door to a deeper connection to our present moment and innermost selves – freeing us to write, draw, color, collage, and create. Krans sets the stage for you to tap into the untamed power of the wild unknown, as you discover how to unleash the imaginative, the intuitive, and the inspired within.

Let That Sh*t Go

Continuing on this out-of-the-box approach to building self-confidence, let’s investigate this book, Let That Sh*t Go, a journal from the author of Zen as F*CK. You may have noticed, we are fans of saucy language here, and honestly, the reason is it gets your attention. This journal not only grabs your attention but keeps it with moments of profanity-laced catharsis and joy through journaling activities and inspirations that are positive as F*CK. Within these truly charming pages, you’ll find ways to let go of the bullsh*t and lift your spirit a little f*cking higher. Whew…that’s spicy right? Good, because we want you to feel spicy! Are you seeing the trend here? We want you to step outside the box of expectations, and these tools are such a great help!

Other Self-Care Tips

Now, outside of self-love books, there are other activities you can do that will improve your self-confidence. Not so sure what they are? Well, we’re about to dive deep with you!

1. Hang out with people that support your goals.

This seems super easy enough, right? Well, for some it’s hard to find supportive people. In a post COVID world, meeting in person may not be for you, so may we present to you the internet. Seriously, go check out various groups and hashtags that can guide you to people that are into the same stuff you’re into. When you feel you belong in a community, then your self-confidence naturally improves because you feel heard and respected.

2. Create daily self-care rituals.

Some people believe in getting up at the same time every day, and their bedtime routine helps them become more confident in their lives. Whatever your ritual is, find it! These daily habits give you a sense of control, which can help ground you when you feel anxious and maybe less than self-confident.

3. Look Back at Your Achievements

Sometimes you need to look back at what you’ve achieved, and if that’s not good enough, then make a goal. Goals help fuel us to move forward and give us something to use for our creative fires. Sometimes self-criticism can sabotage your own perspective, so ask a trusted person in your life to help you with accomplishments.

4. Move your body.

This is not about weight, but about discipline. In yoga, there is a popular phrase: “freedom comes through discipline”. Now all this means is to focus on daily habits and stick to them. For example, if you’re going to walk every day for 20 minutes, then do it and don’t deviate from your plan. Use a planner to keep track of your goals, and these small wins can help build your confidence. Another hack would be to make your bed every morning. This simple task can change the whole energy of your space, and it means you accomplished one thing for the day already. Never think that a single task is too insignificant.

5. Stop Comparing Yourself to Everyone

This is a big one! Are you ready?! Stop comparing yourself to everyone! This will be huge in your self-esteem boost. Every single person has a completely different quest in a completely different game than the one you’re in. Sure, the game of life looks similar, but friends, we’re here to say that each is wildly different. In addition, maybe you take a side quest that other people don’t. You’ll gain experience and new resources that others won’t have, so that alone should deter you from comparing yourself.

Overall, self-confidence can come from a fun makeover, but those results aren’t always everlasting. Self-confidence takes work, and that work can come in a myriad of ways. One of the best things is this list of books and activities is nowhere near complete, which means building your self-confidence might take you on a new side quest you never knew existed. Whatever you decide to do, just know it’s what works for you.

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Meet Kourtney, a writer specializing in sex and relationships. Known for her honest and insightful approach, she explores themes of intimacy and personal growth. Her work combines personal anecdotes, expert opinions, and practical advice, helping readers navigate the complexities of modern relationships and embrace their desires. Kourtney's writing serves as a guide for those seeking authentic and fulfilling connections.